Friday, January 15, 2010

My roommate is snoring and doesn't know I'm here yet. Precipice!

My flight arrived in Dublin at 4:35 this morning, an hour early than I had thought it would.  Five thirty is a decent time for a human to be awake. Awaking at five thirty when you are twenty-one means you are productive, albeit freakishly so. Being awake at four-thirty at any age just means you have insomnia.
Dublin is raining, of course. But I love it. This place makes me feel more observant than is natural. In the past five minutes I have noticed the drapes, a fox and some poor soul leaving the apartment above mine (where I am convinced about twelve different people live) for work.
I was supposed to miss snow, but truth be told, I could seriously give a flying fart. I try to rep the midwest and all that goodness, but let’s get serious, shall we? Chicago is like a girl with no self-esteem, except replace jerkfaces with epic low-pressure systems. What a lame metaphor, but I’m pretty sure my loyal fan base will forgive me. Hi, Mom.
I may have a limited social life, a sick addiction to phenomenology and no umbrella, but I just love the observant calm here. It sets me straight. Nothin’ beats raindrops on your head and foxes in your parking lot.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

New Year, New You!

So, it should be quite obvious what one of my New Year’s Resolutions is - to be consistent with this whole blogging thing! I wish I could say that I just was too busy living to blog about it, but in truth, the last couple of months in Ireland were filled with a lot of work, and very little play.
Therefore, with the handy freshness our society has afforded the people at this time of year, I declare myself without fears. I am going back to Dublin, and I’m going to jump into life, instead of trying to understand it, or keep it in check.
I spent New Years 2010 with a hoard of buddies from Door County, WI, one of my favorite places on Earth. When I arrived we realized that we were going to make Camp David ( our home for another summer. That news made me so excited that I couldn’t stop smiling the entire night. I realized that, in some ways, I was more excited for my summer at Camp D than I was for another semester in Dublin. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that my life in Dublin is ruled by my fears, not by my goals or my passions. I’m too shy to audition for a play and get involved in the theatre. I’m too insecure about my writing to submit a piece to the paper. Meanwhile, I read the paper every week and fiercely critique everything about it!
Although we will always find it impossible to describe that amazing quality that makes us come back to DC year after year, I think part of it resides in the fearless nature of its residents. Living at Camp D, and calling DC home, has taught me that being an active individual is the road to a fulfilled life, or at least a fulfilled day. And I don’t mean active in merely the sense of getting off your butt and biking to work instead of driving (although I did learn that lesson, too), but active in the sense of choosing to do the things you know you want to do, in spite of fears and insecurities holding you back. And that’s another thing. Never, not once, did I feel judged by the people I met there. And that is a fierce feeling. I suspect that that is the heaviest thing most of us carry around with us - our judgements of our selves.
So, in 2010, I’m going to be, I am, done with all that nonsense of self-doubt and anxiety. I mean, I think I’m really awesome - I’m just too freaked out to do anything about it!
Here I go. Resolutions, baby. Yes, everyone does it, and nobody keeps them. But   I’m too young to be that jaded, so here’s to false hope!

Take that writing class at the Irish Writer’s Centre.
Go to Yoga and Boxing (or just sweat at least once a week).
Submit an article to Trinity Publications.
Do something new in Dublin every week! Every day.
Go on trips to the country to hike (Erin Tiernen, are you reading this?!)
Follow through with Dispatches From the Folk (Patsy, are you reading this?!)
No judgments.

New Year’s is also a great time to take a pause, and think of all the people that helped you get through the last year. Here’s a big jug o’ champagne to my Chi-Town Gang, my SLC Lovers, and my Camp D Loves. Sometimes I wonder how its possible that one person is allowed to have this many beautiful people in their lives.

Okay, enough of the sap! I rang in New Year’s with the Blues:

Thinking About a Guinness?

Thinking About a Guinness?